Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. --Ephesians 4:32
In addition to saying nothing negative to your spouse again today, do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness.
What discoveries about love did you make today? What specifically did you do in this dare? How did you show kindness?
The chapter from the book states that kindness is how love acts to maximize a positive circumstance. Patience avoids a problem; kindness creates a blessing. One is reactive and the other is proactive.
All of that made so much sense to me. I remember when I was studying Speech Communications in college- I took a number of Public Relations courses. We learned that there are two types of PR- proactive and reactive. They each had their place, but the proactive PR is crucial if you expect the reactive PR to work. I remembered thinking at the time that life was really the same way. If you were constantly just reacting to life and not proactively living life, you wouldn't make it anywhere.
One discovery I made today is that when I practice patience and kindness- I get love in return. I can't believe the difference I am seeing in my husband who doesn't even know what I am up to. And, maybe he isn't all that different, but I am. It's hard to say, but what I know for sure is that it feels different- in a very good way.
I struggled all day to come up with my random act of kindness. I looked online for ideas, talked to my boss, and thought for hours while working yesterday. It was supposed to be a little thing that would really mean something to them. I didn't want to choose something that I would also benefit from. My boss asked me "What is something that he is responsible for or that he always does?" He always takes the boys for their walks, so I decided to do that for him today.
We grabbed dinner at Furr's because both of us were not feeling well and didn't want to cook. On the way home, I told him that I would take the boys for a walk so he could go ahead and take his shower and relax. I was afraid he might question me about it, but he didn't. While walking the dogs, I got the idea that I should write a note on the mirror with lipstick. I hurried back to the house, ran up the stairs and tiptoed into the bathroom. I could not find a single lipstick! I guess I carry them all in my purse (which was downstairs)! I grabbed my red lipgloss and wrote I love you on the mirror. Just as I finished the shower turned off and I hauled booty out of there. He was really touched.
I think that I showed kindness because I did a chore for him that he does everyday and I let him know how I feel about him in an unexpected way.
What I really saw is that I have not been showing kindness. I have been really selfish- without even knowing it. I also realized that Havie shows me kindness all the time in lots of little ways that I have totally taken for granted.