Sunday, January 3, 2010

Hunger

The first Sunday of the month, we fast and pray about something specific. We go without food or water for 24 hours, or basically two meals. It serves two purposes:

1. It shows God how serious we are the particular subject we are praying about.

2. We then tithe what we would have spent on food for those meals we missed and the Bishop then uses it to provide meals for the hungry.

It is my favorite weekend even though it is tough for me. It has brought home just how much my world revolves around food. My first fast was a HUGE wake up call. I sat there an OBSESSED about wanting to eat even though I wasn't even hungry. And really, it's ok to be hungry. Yes it is an uncomfortable feeling, but it isn't painful. I've realized that I NEVER let myself even get hungry. I'm so focused on preventing the uncomfortable that it had been a really long time since I had even FELT hunger.

I won't eat again until dinner tonight and while I've had pangs of hunger at different times throughout the day, they have passed. At the moment I feel fine, but I can smell the lasagna in the crock pot and I'm a little tempted. It reminds me of something I heard recently:

The pain of sacrifice only lasts a short while. It's the fear of the pain that causes us to hesitate indefinitely.

I could go into a whole diatribe about how we have made a whole culture of avoiding pain and sacrifice, but I won't. I am just glad to be removing the hold food has on me, even if it's just for 24 hours once a month.

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