Oh, I crack myself up sometimes...
So, it's been 10 days since my life turned sideways, and much has happened since my last blog, but I just haven't been ready to share because I'm still processing it myself.
About a week ago, my husband had yet another change of heart. He decided that he loved me and he missed me and he wanted to work things out, but he still wasn't coming home. And I have come to understand why he is unwilling to leave this job. For one, there just isn't work going on in his field right now. Two, this is turning out to be a great opportunity for him professionally. They have already discussed promotion with him. They are installing a state-of-the-art system that is the first of it's kind. If it goes well, they are going to be doing the same thing all around the country. This might revolutionize the oil refining industry, which will be great knowledge when he starts working on his engineering degree.
So, we are basically in this "in-between" state. There isn't much we can do right now other than work on ourselves. I can't worry about what he's doing or not doing. I can only focus on what I am doing or not doing. I really don't know what is going to happen or where this is going to go. I love my husband, and I believe in our marriage. We are both imperfect humans and we have spent too much time just settling back into what is comfortable instead of really dealing with our issues.
But I am refusing to just settle back in this time. I have lost some of my momentum over the weekend. It was difficult for me- very lonely. I felt myself starting to slip into depression territory. Which makes it that much more important for me to stay focused on my goals.
I leave for Denver early Saturday morning. I'm praying that the weekend together will provide us an opportunity to regain our footing. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers!